


No Wheels

by isabeau25



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Gen, Lance-centered, this was writen for the voltrongenminibang
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-24
Updated: 2017-07-24
Packaged: 2018-12-06 01:12:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 14,103
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11589951
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/isabeau25/pseuds/isabeau25
Summary: In the wake of Shiro's disappearance, the team struggles to get their feet back under them, and Lance tries to be whatever the team needs him to be, even if that means being separated from his beloved Blue.





	No Wheels

**Author's Note:**

> This is my entry for the [Voltron Gen Mini Bang](https://voltrongenminibang.tumblr.com/), and I'm so excited to finally get to post it. I got paired up with the very talented and lovely [Xandriella](https://xandriella.tumblr.com/) for this, and you can see her amazing artwork in the story. It you'd like to see it on her tumblr, here is the link: <https://xandriella.tumblr.com/post/163345706253/heres-my-entry-for-the-voltron-gen-mini-bang-i>

Pidge was finally getting around to uploading all the backlogged battle logs. Usually each Paladin did that themselves, but everything had been so chaotic leading up to the “big battle” and then with Shiro…

Well, she needed something to keep her busy, anyway.

Both their Lions and their armor recorded data during missions. Downloading it wasn’t that hard, but in order for it to be useful, there was a certain amount of summarizing that had to take place.

Pidge was beginning to realize that Lance must have normally done a lot of editing before he turned in his logs, because he talked to himself a lot. Like a lot. Like he could carry on half hour conversations with himself with no one listening.

He muted his mic a lot too, which Pidge thought maybe she should talk to him about. The mics, like the rest of their armor, were primarily operated by mental commands, so it was fast and easy to switch the mic on and off. Pidge knew Lance was turning his off so he wouldn’t distract anyone with his talking, but it still seemed dangerous to her. If something were to happen, and he got into trouble or hurt and didn’t think to unmute his mic, they might not realize he needed help.

On the other hand, she didn’t really want to listen to him talk all the time while they were on missions. Why couldn’t Lance just keep his thoughts on the inside like a normal person?

“ _Pidge is the hacker of our group._ ”

Pidge glanced at the streaming data with an amused smile. She knew Lance was talking to the yupper, and it did sound like a person the way it answered him. She probably would have thought it was Slav too without any other information to go on.

Pidge let the audio run while she worked on another project, only half listening as Lance bragged about his teammates to what was essentially a giant murder-puppy. Lance annoyed her sometimes, but he was actually a pretty sweet guy when he wasn’t being obnoxious.

“ _I thought I was the team’s sharpshooter, but I guess no one else thinks that._ ”

Pidge’s fingers froze on her keyboard.

 _“Maybe I don’t have a thing._ ”

Her fingers tightened into fists. Lance couldn’t really think that, could he?

“ _They wouldn’t keep me on the team if I didn’t contribute something, would they? Maybe I’m just a fifth wheel. Seventh if you count Coran and Allura. That’s a horrible wheel to be._ ”

Pidge swallowed, her chest feeling tight and uncomfortable, and her stomach twisting in a knot. Lance wouldn’t… he couldn’t really think that. He had to know that he was important to them, and not just because he was a good shot, which he was.

He was their teammate; he was their friend. He didn’t need a ‘thing’.

Lance wasn’t… he really wasn’t okay, but none of them were. They had lost Shiro, and they had no idea what had happened to him, or even if he was still alive. Nothing they had tried so far had given them any answers.

Keith was flying Black because the Lion wouldn’t accept anyone else as a pilot, but his bond with her wasn’t strong enough yet for him to ask what had happened or understand the answer, even if she had given it. Pidge didn’t think Keith liked flying Black that much, and not just because it meant Shiro wasn’t there to do it. She had caught him giving Red longing looks more than once, but he was trying so hard to be a good Black Paladin.

He was trying so hard that sometimes Pidge thought he might implode or something.

Lance though, Pidge couldn’t remember the last time she had seen him outside of training and meals, and he had been skipping those more and more often. He couldn’t be happy with how things were. He hadn’t protested at all when Black had chosen Keith as team lead, and he hadn’t been giving Keith any grief, which honestly, felt pretty strange to Pidge. It was normal for them to bicker. Lance just quietly doing whatever he was asked didn’t feel normal at all.

Really though, he should have said something, anything, when Allura had announced she thought the best course of action was for her to try to pilot the Blue Lion, because she was the ‘easiest’. Sometimes, Pidge wondered about Allura and what her actual experience with the Lions was, because none of them were easy to pilot.

Plus, Lance loved Blue. There were times Pidge thought he liked Blue more than he liked the rest of them put together, but he hadn’t said anything about Allura’s plan. He just let them go ahead with it.

It left Lance stuck piloting Red. Allura had had some kind of rationale for why Red was more likely to accept him over her. Something about them forming a connection with the other Lions through forming Voltron, and yeah, they could kind of feel the other Lions there when they formed Voltron, but it was nothing like the bond they had with their own Lions.

And seriously? Red? Red could be kind of a jerk, if Keith was to be believed. He had always said it with utter fondness, but still. Now that she was thinking about it, it was bizarre that Lance hadn’t said anything about the switch.

So maybe Lance really wasn’t okay. Even less okay then the rest of them.

Pidge just didn’t know what to do about it. She couldn’t just tell Lance that she had heard him say he felt like they didn’t need him, and it wasn’t true. She knew him well enough to know he wouldn’t believe her.

Maybe Hunk would know what to do. He and Lance had been friends forever, and if he didn’t know, then Pidge would just have to come up with something herself.

Because they flew Lions. There were no wheels, seventh or otherwise.

* * *

“Begin level 7,” Lance rolled out his shoulders before bringing his gun up.

The empty space filled with walls and debris, simulating a battle field. The Alteans never did anything by halves after all, and there was nothing that difficult about shooting drones, even if they were moving. Level 3 had started introducing obstacles, and when Lance wasn’t totally exhausted, it made the whole thing more fun, but he was never not exhausted these days.

They didn’t train for fun though.

Lance crouched down behind a wall, listening to the hum of the drones as they dispersed throughout the course. He had run this course twice already, but he wasn’t satisfied with his score. He was never satisfied with his score. It just wasn’t good enough. Too many things counted on him being better than he actually was.

Lance peered around the corner, taking out two drones with a quick double shot.

This probably wasn’t what he should have been doing. He was at least competent at this. He was terrible at flying Red. She was used to having a pilot of Keith’s caliber, and Lance just wasn’t that.

He took out three more drones as he pressed farther into the artificial terrain. Blue grumbled in the back of his mind, perpetually unhappy since Allura had started piloting her. Lance didn’t know what to tell her. He was the only member of the team who was replaceable, so what else were they going to do with Shiro gone.

Blue’s displeasure sharpened significantly, distracting Lance enough that he took a shot in the shoulder from one of the drones. He turned sharply and fired, then took out another one before pausing to rub his shoulder.

Alteans had a do or die kind of mentality to training of all kinds, although Lance hadn’t reached the actual ‘die’ level yet. He was high enough up, though, that it hurt when he got hit, even through his armor, and it would leave a mark.

He appreciated that Blue liked him, but she was probably the only one on the ship at this point who thought he was worth anything. Allura had already proven there was nothing unique about his ability to pilot her.

And Red certainly would have rather had someone else piloting her, even if she wasn’t fighting him on it. He had trouble following what she wanted. Red was too fast and too impatient, and he felt like she was always frustrated with him.

But why wouldn’t she be? He wasn’t her Paladin, after all. Lance was sure she was only putting up with him because Keith had asked her to. He was a poor substitute for Keith; he always had been. At least Red only had to put up with him until they found Shiro.

If they found Shiro.

Lance squeezed his eyes shut, his breath freezing in his chest at the traitorous thought. He took two hits before he could force himself to move again, turning and taking out another drone.

Shiro wasn’t dead. They would have known; they would have felt it. Black would have known, and she would have told Keith.

Shiro wasn’t dead.

Lance used the momentum of his anger to finish off the rest of the drones. They would find Shiro. There were no other options.

The holograms dissolved around him, leaving him in an empty room, and he rubbed his eyes tiredly. Blue pushed against him, insistent that he needed to stop, needed to rest.

Her presence wasn’t as sharp as it used to be before he had started piloting Red. It felt muted now, like listening to someone talking when you were underwater. He missed her.

“Begin level 8.”

* * *

Pidge had to jog to keep up with Hunk’s longer strides. It was obvious the Yellow Paladin had a purpose in mind, although Pidge felt like she had trailed after him through half the ship as he searched for Lance.

Hunk hadn’t taken it well when Pidge had come to find him after dinner and tell him about Lance. She had told him what she had heard, taken a breath to say she thought Lance had really meant it, and hadn’t been able to get the words out before Hunk had shoved back from his work table and stalked out of the room with Pidge on his heels.

He didn’t seem angry exactly, but ‘worried’ seemed a little too tame for the expression on his face. Determined maybe, but Pidge wasn’t sure what exactly Hunk was determined to do once he found Lance.

“Maybe he’s in Red’s hanger,” Pidge suggested, “also, what are we going to do when we find him? If we just tell him that it’s not true, he won’t believe us.”

“No, because when he gets stuff like this stuck in his thick head, he doesn’t listen to anyone,” Hunk stopped abruptly, and Pidge almost ran into him.

They had already checked Blue’s hanger, three different training decks, all the commons areas, and Lance’s room. He didn’t seem to be anywhere.

“He always looks exhausted after flying Red, so I’m not sure he would be with her if he wanted some place quiet to go,” Hunk regarded both sides of the hallway junction, “but we’ve looked everywhere else, so it’s worth a try.”

Hunk turned in the direction of Red’s hanger, although getting there from where they were was going to be a kind of roundabout route, and Pidge hurried after him.

“So, what are we going to do when we find Lance?” Pidge asked, again, for about the fourth time.

She wanted to know there was some kind of plan in place here. Lance was important; he deserved a plan. Also Lance was slippery sometimes, and they probably needed one.

“I don’t know yet,” Hunk shrugged, “I’ll figure it out when I find him.”

“That’s a really Keith kind of plan,” Pidge frowned at his back.

“Keith’s plans work okay,” Hunk paused again, regarding another intersection thoughtfully, ”as long as we’re there to back him up.”

And, of course, they were going to back Keith up the very best that they could. Shiro had thought Keith could do it, and they trusted Shiro. They were going to make sure Keith had every possible chance of succeeding as their leader.

And also hopefully stop his head from imploding from the stress.

Hunk turned left, and Pidge had no idea how he was going to get to Red’s hanger going this way, but she kept following. Lance probably wasn’t in Red’s hanger anyway. He seemed to be doing pretty well flying the Red Lion, but he didn’t enjoy it the way he had enjoyed flying Blue.

Allura didn’t seem to be enjoying flying Blue all that much, for that matter. She kept acting like she had it all under control, but they could all tell she wasn’t connecting well with the Lion. A lot of times it felt like the two of the them were pulling in completely opposite directions, and Blue, being the ancient and powerful magic sentient robot, usually won, leaving Allura frustrated and sullen.

Hunk stopped sharply again, and Pidge opened her mouth to protest almost running into him, but he shushed her. She looked around him and spotted Lance, hands in his pockets and head down, oblivious to anyone else in the hall with him.

He turned a corner, and Hunk followed on his tip toes. Pidge trailed after him, equal parts amused and concerned. Hopefully, this wasn’t a full blown Keith plan. Ambushes were great and all, but she didn’t think Lance would appreciate being on the receiving end of one.

Lance’s back was to them, and Hunk took two large strides, closing the distance between them, and grabbed Lance under the arms, lifting him off the ground. Lance yelped and flailed, twisting to see who had grabbed him, then squirmed some more when he saw it was Hunk.

“Hunk! Put me down!” he kicked his feet in the air, but he didn’t try to kick Hunk.

Hunk ignored him, hefting him up and down a little as if he was trying to gauge his weight. Pidge couldn’t help the giggle that escaped her.

“Hunk, seriously,” Lance tried to twist himself free, “what are you doing?”

Hunk gave him a speculative look, then set him on his feet, tugging on the back of his jacket until Lance let him pull it off. Hunk tossed it to Pidge, then picked Lance back up. The jacket was surprisingly heavy.

“Hunk, this really isn’t necessary,” Lance insisted.

Hunk gave him another heft or two, then nodded, the determined look back on his face.

“Yes it is,” Hunk set Lance on his feet, but only so he could turn him around and throw him over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes, “you need to eat.”

“Dinner was less than an hour ago,” Lance protested as Hunk turned in the direction of the kitchen.

“You weren’t at dinner,” Pidge reminded him.

Lance blinked at her, then braced a hand against Hunk’s back so he had the leverage to flail in her general direction with the other, “give me back my jacket.”

“This thing weighs a ton,” Pidge tossed it over her shoulder, “what do you have in here, rocks?

“No,” Lance glared at her, “well, yes, but…”

“Wait, you actually have rocks in your pockets?” Pidge started digging through the pockets of the jacket.

“Just give it back,” Lance kicked his feet as if he could swim over Hunk’s shoulder, and Hunk bounced him, causing his hand to slip and his head to dip down.

Pidge was more than happy to play keep away if that kept Lance too distracted to put any real effort into escaping Hunk.

Pidge wasn’t surprised to find wireless headphones in his pocket, although she was curious where he had gotten them from, since she had needed hers back.She knew what the embroidery floss was for, although the bundle she pulled out was so tangled that Lance clearly hadn’t used it in a while. There was a small spray canister in another pocket, and she didn’t recognize the writing on it.

“What’s this?” she asked, holding it up for Lance to see.

“It’s liquid bandage,” Lance huffed, purposely digging his elbow into Hunk’s back so he could use it to prop his chin up on his hand, “you spray it on cuts and scrapes instead of using a band aid or something like that. You have a can in the first aid kit on your Lion too.”

“Why do you carry around bandages?” Hunk asked worriedly.

“I don’t usually,” Lance squirmed, renewing his efforts to wiggle free of Hunk, “I just needed to restock Red’s first aid kit, and I haven’t gotten down to the hanger yet.”

“You used all of Red’s bandages?” Pidge raised an eyebrow at him.

“No,” Lance tried to push himself off Hunk with both hands, and Hunk bounced him again, knocking the wind out of him a little.

“Stop squirming,” Hunk admonished.

“Keith used all of it, and no one had gotten around to restocking it yet,” Lance grumbled, his voice muffled as he gave up and hung limply over Hunk’s shoulder.

Pidge tucked it back in the pocket she had pulled it from, and her hand closed around something round and about the size of a walnut. She pulled it out and grinned.

“You really do have rocks in here!” she laughed.

“I told you I did,” Lance grumbled, “they’re phosphorescent.”

“Really?” Pidge cupped the rock in her hands and peered in, seeing a faint green glow, “that’s really cool! Where did you get them?”

“That one planet,” Lance waved his hand dismissively without looking up, “the one with all those weird geysers.”

“Fairterrian,” Hunk supplied the name of the planet as they reached the kitchen. Instead of setting Lance on his feet, he slid him off his shoulder and set him on the counter, “stay there.”

Lance pouted at him as he moved away to start poking through cupboards and pulling out pots. Pidge leaned back against the counter between Lance’s knees, elbows resting on his legs, just to make sure he didn’t try to go anywhere, and held the rock up to the light, studying it.

[ ](https://xandriella.tumblr.com/post/163345706253/heres-my-entry-for-the-voltron-gen-mini-bang-i)

“Have you done any research on why they glow yet?” she asked.

“No,” Lance dug his chin into the top of her head sullenly, arms resting on her shoulders, “they’re not radioactive, though; I checked that. You can have that one. I picked up a whole bag of them while we were there.”

While Hunk set about heating up dinner for a second time, Pidge peppered Lance with questions, first about the rocks, then about the black stone bead on a chain she found in one of his jacket’s inner pockets..

“It’s an azabaches,” Lance grumbled, “a protection charm.”

Pidge grinned and tucked it back in the pocket. She didn’t really believe in superstitions, but she wasn’t going to turn her nose up at anything that might help them protect Lance.

“You want weird alien tuber empanadas, or weird alien goo empanadas?” Hunk asked.

“Surprise me,” Lance said unenthusiastically.

“There’s also weird alien fruit empanadas for dessert,” Pidge added, “although, I don’t know if people who skip dinner get dessert.”

“I think we can make an exception,” Hunk put the empanadas into the oven, “probably for Keith too.”

“Did Keith skip dinner?” Lance frowned, digging his knees into Pidge’s sides to try to get her to move.

“Why are your knees so boney?” Pidge complained, pinching Lance’s leg to get him to stop.

“Probably the same reason your fingers are,” Lance retaliated by digging his fingers under her arms.

Pidge shrieked and jerked away, using Lance’s coat to smack him. Lance caught it and tugged it back, a grin on his face. The grin only got bigger when Pidge refused to let it go.

“There is no violence in the kitchen!” Hunk picked Pidge up, setting her down away from Lance and leaving Lance with his jacket.

“That wasn’t violence,” Pidge grumbled, “that was cheating.”

Lance started to slid off the counter, and Hunk stopped him with a hand on his chest, “you’re still in counter time out.”

“Really?” Lance rolled his eyes and put his jacket back on.

“Yes, really,” Hunk folded his arms over his chest, “now behave or I’m putting Pidge back.”

“Congratulations Pidge,” Lance leaned to the side to see her around Hunk, “you’ve graduated from lab gremlin to lunch counter guard.”

“Technically it’s a kitchen counter,” Pidge straightened her glasses, “and at least I’m not the one in time out.”

“You’re both going to be in time out if you don’t knock it off,” Hunk sighed and went to pull the empanadas out of the oven.

He plated two for Lance and handed Pidge another fruit one, which she dug into immediately. Lance was less enthusiastic, but Hunk stared at him until he started eating. Once he actually started eating, Lance seemed to gain more interest in the food.

“Delicious, as always, Hunk,” Lance smiled, and Hunk beamed back at him.

* * *

“You missed dinner.”

Keith jumped, uncurling stiffly from where he had been huddled against Red’s front paw to give Lance a guilty look.

Really, if he was going to be with any of the Lions, he should have been with Black, trying to strengthen his pitifully weak bond with her, but he missed Red. Everything seemed so hard now; he just wanted something that felt right for a little while.

“Hunk made empanadas,” Lance held a plate out to him, “they’re good.”

“Thanks,” Keith took the plate without much enthusiasm.

Lance hesitated a moment, then sat on the hanger floor next to Keith, drawing his knees up to wrap his arms around loosely and leaning against Red’s paw.

“Apparently, if you skip dinner, you don’t get dessert,” Lance said as Keith began to eat.

“What was for dessert?” much like Lance, Keith’s appetite seemed to pick up as soon as he was eating, and he ate quickly.

“Weird alien fruit empanadas,” Lance answered, “I was informed that exceptions could be made to the no dessert rule, but I’m not sure what the requirements are.”

“Weird alien fruit,” Keith repeated skeptically.

“They’re actually really good,” Lance smiled, “I suspect the only real requirements are that you ask Hunk.”

“Everything Hunk makes is good,” Keith finished off the first empanada and started on the second.

“He’s a talented guy,” Lance shrugged.

“Yeah,” Keith agreed absently.

“Pidge is evil though,” Lance leaned his head back against Red.

Keith almost asked, then decided against it. He was decisively unqualified to handle disputes between his teammates. He felt like he was mostly unqualified to handle just about anything at the moment that didn’t involve stabbing or punching really hard.

“At least she’s on our side,” Lance continued, “mostly. I think.”

Keith finished his dinner and almost passed the empty plate back to Lance, then decided against it, even if taking it back to the kitchen himself might mean getting glared at by Hunk for skipping dinner.

“You’re probably here for Red,” Keith shifted to stand up, “I’ll just…”

“Not really,” Lance shook his head, “I was just bringing you dinner.”

“You’re…” Keith frowned, feeling like there was a question he should be asking, but not sure exactly what it was, “you seem like you’re doing okay with Red.”

Lance shrugged, “yeah, I guess. She doesn’t really talk to me, but I mostly understand her when we’re flying, I think.”

Keith felt Red’s grumbling, irritation not really directed at Lance, but irritation all the same. He glanced at Lance, but he didn’t seem to have noticed anything. Red was unhappy with the current arrangement, but not belligerent towards Lance as far as Keith could tell. Mostly, she complained that he was too much like Blue, but she didn’t seem to hold that against him.

“Does Blue actually like having Allura as her pilot?” Keith asked.

Lance gave him a surprised look, then his expression went blank, and he looked away, “Blue is flexible, and Allura is an experienced pilot. They’re fine.”

“That’s not what I asked,” Keith pressed.

The answer suddenly seemed important. Red was unhappy, Black was tolerant but not thrilled, and Keith felt like this whole thing was a mistake. Maybe not as big a mistake as Shiro leaving him in charge, but it felt wrong. Allura just seemed to know so much more about the Lions, and she had so much more experience. When she had said she thought this was the best course, Keith didn’t know how to tell her he thought it wasn’t, couldn’t figure out how to articulate why it felt wrong when everything felt wrong without Shiro.

“She’s…” Lance shifted, seeming strangely uncomfortable with the question, “Allura is just… she’s kind of bossy and stubborn.”

Keith couldn’t help the bark of laughter that escaped him, “and you’re not stubborn?”

“It’s different,” Lance waved his hand dismissively, “she’s stubborn like you. It’s a different kind of stubborn.”

There was an answer in there somewhere, and Keith couldn’t help but feel like Lance knew it and was refusing to tell him for some reason. It was frustrating.

“Well, what do you think?” Keith demanded, “should we keep doing it this way?”

Lance hesitated again, then shrugged, “you’re the boss, chief. We’ll do whatever you think is best.”

“Don’t call me that,” Keith groaned, letting his head fall to rest on his knees; that was not what he wanted to hear for so many reasons.

“Boss or chief?” Lance asked.

“Either,” Keith glared.

“You got it, el capitan,” Lance grinned.

Keith punched him in the arm and wasn’t even sorry when he yelped.

* * *

Apparently, level 10 was when the drones started drawing blood.

Lance got hit a second time for watching himself bleed, and finished the run instead of shutting it down. He had been close to done anyway. It was sort of impressive, actually. Their armor was tough, even the flexible black under armor, and both shots had cut through it. The fact that the Alteans apparently considered this a lower mid-range level explained a lot about Allura.

He wasn’t bleeding that badly, but it  would be better if he stopped and put his armor through the repair cycle. Launching into battle with the under armor damaged would be a bad thing. Space suits didn’t work well if they weren’t airtight.

And maybe he should do something about the bleeding.

Lance opened a compartment in the wall, sliding out the shelves to get the first aid kit, then started stripping off the top of his armor. The first hit had gotten him in the left arm, the second on his right side, just under the edge of the chest armor. Neither looked like it needed more than cleaning and a bandage.

“Lance!”

Lance jumped and turned to find Allura striding towards him looking unhappy.

“What happened?” she demanded.

Lance flinched and reached for the disinfectant. He knew he wasn’t up to Allura’s standards when it came to training. He really didn’t need her to tell him that over and over again.

“Just got clipped by a drone,” Lance sprayed disinfectant on the cuts.

“Through your armor?” Allura caught his wrist, looking over his arm, then pulled it up so she could see his side, “what level were you training at?”

Lance had no sense of personal space. He was too used to being poked, prodded, and pounced on by his horde of relatives. He wasn’t necessarily uncomfortable with Allura manhandling him, but that didn’t mean he particularly wanted her to either.

He pulled his hand free and reached for the spray on bandage with a shrug. He didn’t really feel like getting lectured for getting injured on a setting Allura considered relatively low. Admonishment to try harder felt particularly bitter at that moment, and he was hoping she would just move on.

Allura frowned at him and turned to the wall, bringing up the control panel. Lance did his best to suppress a sigh.

“You were on level ten?” Allura gave him an incredulous look, “you shouldn’t be training on a level this high alone.”

“It’s set for solo runs,” Lance tried not to scowl; he had never heard anyone else told they couldn’t train alone.

“You could get hurt,” Allura’s brows knit together as she scrolled through Lance’s scores, “you did get hurt.”

“It was just my first run at that level,” Lance protested, “next time I go through, it’ll be fine.”

“Next time you go through, you need someone to spot you,” Allura looked away from his scores, lips pressed into a thin line.

Lance wanted to yell, as unreasonable as that was. He had gotten hit after all, but he just wanted room and time to figure this out. He wanted to get good at this without being yelled at for not doing it perfectly the first time.

“I’ll think about it,” Lance snapped up his armor from where he had dropped it at his feet.

“Lance, I mean it,” she put a hand on his shoulder, forcing him to pause, “we can’t afford to have anyone injured.”

Lance took a slow breath and let it out.

“Got it,” Lance said, “I understand.”

Allura watched him leave the training deck, not sure that he really did.

* * *

Blue was intensely irritated, and Lance was trying very hard not to be distracted by it. Every instinct he had told him he needed to try to do something about it, but if he got distracted from Red, there were going to be lots of problems.

When Allura had announced that Blue was easy to fly, Lance had known she was right. Blue was a light touch and a redirection, an easy flow and a current that he could follow with surety, no matter how suddenly it changed course. Blue was a joy to fly.

Red was none of those things. Allura was right that Blue was easy to fly, but she was wrong about the connection with Voltron allowing Lance to fly Red with any kind of proficiency.

No matter how hard Lance tried, listening to Red was like trying to understand someone yelling at him when he was underwater. It was everything he could do just to try to understand what she wanted. She changed too quickly, jumped from one demand to another too fast. There was no buildup and flow for him to follow. Red just seemed to race from on movement to the next, and it was everything Lance could do to keep up.

Which was why it would be bad if he got distracted trying to figure out why Blue was upset. Losing focus at all meant losing the tentative connection he had with Red, and that always lead to disaster.

Blue swerved sharply, narrowly avoiding Yellow Lion. There was something that sounded very much like Altean cursing across the comm.

“Allura, you doing okay?” Hunk asked.

“Fine,” Allura said sharply, “I have everything well in hand.”

Keith’s frustrated sigh was audible across the comms, and Lance was able to pick up a vague echo of the same frustration coming from Red. Nothing like the ice sharp crack of anger that came so clearly from Blue. Lance should probably talk to her after they finished the training run. She felt like she needed to vent.

“Lance, just take out the last droid so we can be done,” Keith said wearily.

“Got it,” Lance pulled back, rising above the others so he could see the droid clearly.

Red jumped at the idea of ripping the training bot apart with her claws, and Lance pressed back with the idea of just shooting it from where they were.  Red wasn’t opposed to it, and Lance brought up the targeting screen.

That sort of exchange was almost instantaneous with Blue, and they were generally on the same page with what they wanted to do. He and Red almost never were, but Red did like shooting things, and Lance had enjoyed learning her weapons systems. She was built for close range combat, and her artillery systems reflected that, but Lance was finding as he got familiar with them that he could coax more and more range from them.

Red fell back to let him focus. That was the dance the two of them were slowly learning, when to fall back and stay out of each other’s way so they could function with some kind of efficiency. From what Lance knew of piloting Blue, this wasn’t how the bond was really supposed to work. He and Blue had always done everything together, but that didn’t work with Red. Lance just wasn’t the caliber of pilot Keith was, and it left Red forced to constantly have to slow down so Lance could keep up.

Lance brought the droid into focus, lining up the shot and using the tail laser to fire. It was a far shot for Red, and very satisfying to see it disintegrate into nothing. Red seemed to think so too, and Lance couldn’t help but grin in response. Although, Red’s satisfaction manifested in an urge to find more things to fight, or race the other Lions, while Lance was ready to head back.

“Nice shot, Lance!” Hunk cheered over the line.

“That’s the last one,” Keith sounded much less enthusiastic, “let’s head in.”

Red tugged a bit for a run through the asteroid field, and Lance eyed it uncertainly. It looked fun, but Lance didn’t have the confidence in his reflexes, or at least, he didn’t have the confidence that he would be able to respond to Red quickly enough to get them through without taking lots of hits.

Red relented easily, and they headed back to the Castle.

* * *

Lance heard raised voices coming towards him and instinctively ducked around a corner. He wasn’t up for arguing, even if it was someone else doing it.

“… have everything under control,” Allura’s voice drifted down the hall.

“Right,” Keith scoffed, “that’s why you almost plowed into someone. Twice.”

This was not a conversation Lance wanted to overhear, but they were heading in his direction, and he couldn’t go anywhere without them seeing him.

“The Blue Lion’s controls are very precise,” Allura came even with where Lance was hiding, and he could see the scowl on her face, “they take time to adjust to.”

“Lance picked it up right away, and he had never even heard of the Lions before,” Keith countered.

“And if Lance can do it, anyone should be able to,” Allura said sharply.

Lance flinched, squeezing his eyes closed tightly.

“Obviously not, given how much trouble you’re having with it,” Keith stopped walking, forcing Allura to stop as well.

Something inside Lance relaxed just a little. He really would have been happy if Keith and Allura had moved on though. Blue was simmering in the back of his head, and he didn’t want to hear any more of this argument. Flying the Lions was hard, probably harder than Allura had expected, and Lance wasn’t surprised she was frustrated.

“Keith, we have to make this work,” Allura sounded desperate.

“Well, we have to make something work, but I don’t know if…”

“There isn’t another way,” Allura insisted, “we need all the Lions.”

“I know that, but…”

“So, I’ll make this work,” Allura said firmly, “I’ll figure out how to control Blue Lion better. I just need more practice.”

Keith’s sigh was audible as they walked by, and Lance could sympathize. There was no way Allura was going to form a good bond with Blue thinking like that, but if she wouldn’t listen to Keith, she definitely wasn’t going to care what Lance had to say.  

They finally moved passed Lance, and he stayed still until he couldn’t hear their footsteps any longer, then continued onto Blue’s hangar.

Blue was waiting for him impatiently. She lowered her head, opening her mouth for him as soon as he came into the hanger. It was nice to feel wanted, and Lance obliged without hesitation. It occurred to him as he dropped bonelessly into the pilot’s seat that it felt like a long time since he had sat there.

Blue grumbled at him, frustrated and indignant at Allura thinking she could control a Lion. High seas, Lance thought a bit hazily, feeling more comfortable and safe then he had in awhile. He let Blue’s emotions wash over him, sympathetic that Allura, who should have been listening to her, wasn’t.

Allura was trying; she really was, but piloting a Lion was apparently a lot different than what she had expected. _If she would just listen,_ Blue complained, _you always listen._

Lance gave a huff of laughter, leaning his head back. He tried to listen, but he wasn’t always very good at it. Blue was easy to listen to, even when she was irritated. It was like choppy seas, just windy enough to froth up white caps on the waves.

He used to live for days like that. His older brother and sister would take him out with them on their catamaran, and they would catch the wind, and they could go so fast.

Blue faded into the memory with him, the taste of the salt, and the wind in his hair, his brother’s laughter, and his sister’s commands to keep the sail trim and with the wind.

Lance didn’t mind when the sea got a little rough; they just had to learn to stay ahead of the wind.

* * *

Something was buzzing, and Blue helpfully informed him that it was the comm in his helmet. He blinked blurrily, not having remembered falling asleep. He must have been more tired than he thought. He was still tired.

His comm was still buzzing, and he groped blindly for where he had dropped it next to his chair. It took him a minute to find it, because he refused to lean over and actually look. He was too comfortable slumped down in the pilot's chair to move if he didn’t have to.

Blue was laughing at him, and Lance pointedly ignored her as his fingers hit against his helmet, and he snatched it up, putting it on his head.

“What’s up?” he activated the comm.

“Where are you?” Keith asked, sounding more confused than annoyed.

Lance rubbed his eyes and stifled a yawn, trying to remember if there was anywhere he was supposed to be. He wasn’t even sure what time it was, but he couldn’t remember anyone talking about any more training after the drills in the Lions.

He didn’t really want to say he was with Blue. He was supposed to be focusing on figuring out how to work with Red. Falling asleep in Blue’s cockpit felt an awful lot like slacking.

“I got distracted,” Lance said instead, “what did you need?”

“It’s dinner time,” Keith informed him, “Hunk says we can’t eat until you get here.”

“Why?” Lance wrinkled his nose.

Lance knew Hunk cooked when he was stressed and liked to feed people when he was worried about them, but their usual meal schedule had dissolved a while ago. There were general times they tended to drift into the kitchen to eat, but they were all busy with different work, and their schedules didn’t usually match up enough to eat together.

“I have no idea,” Keith sounded almost amused, “but he made something that smells really good, and he says we can’t eat until you get here, so hurry up.”

Lance laughed, “I’m on my way. I’ll be there in like ten minutes. You guys go head and start.”

Keith relayed the message, and Lance heard talking in the background.

“Hunk still says no,” Keith passed on, “get down here before Pidge starts eating her laptop.”

“I’m coming,” Lance reassured him, pushing himself out of his chair.

Lance climbed out of Blue and reached back to pat her nose. She rumbled at him, shaking the ground under his feet. It wasn’t quite a happy noise, although it felt almost like a thank you. He rested his forehead against her muzzle, wishing he was coming back next time they needed to fly.

“This won’t be forever, beautiful,” Lance murmured, “we’ll find Shiro and everything will go back to how it should be.”

They both knew that wasn’t a good solution, but for now, it was all Lance had to offer.

* * *

 Lance didn’t know how the universal translators worked, and he was a little afraid to ask. He didn’t actually want to know if Altean tech had somehow altered his brain without even asking first. At least, he could turn it off. It wasn’t much different from flipping the comm in his helmet on and off; he just had to want to hear the language instead of the translation.

Galra wasn’t nearly as guttural or evil sounding as he had assumed it would be. It was an unexpectedly light language. The more Lance listened to it, the more he thought there might be parts of it that strayed outside the human range of hearing. He wasn’t sure yet.

He was starting to pick it up in bits and pieces though, not quite as quickly as he was puzzling out the written language, but he was getting there.

There was no point yet in listening to anything important. Too much of a chance of getting something wrong and misleading the team. He was pretty amused by what he was listening to though. They picked up a lot of chatter, more than they could really analyze, and the track Lance was currently listening to had been categorized as low importance, because the base it came from was a low priority base.

As far as Lance could tell, it was two guys talking smack about their commanding officer. Probably. He didn’t think being compared to a grumpwallow’s rump was meant to be a complement.

“Hey.”

Lance jumped slightly when Pidge pulled his headphones off. He tipped his head back to find her grinning at him.

“Hey,” he smiled back, “what’s up?”

“I need your help,” she said.

“You know, they have these things called stools,” Lance teased, even as he stood, “they’re built especially for short people.”

“Shut up,” Pidge smacked his arm playfully, “not everyone can be freakishly tall.”

“I’m just talented that way,” Lance said mildly.

“Well, hopefully, you’re talented at keeping your balance too,” Pidge grabbed his arm, tugging him towards her workshop, “otherwise this is going to be more fun for me then you.”

“I feel like I should be worried,” Lance let himself be pulled along.

Pidge’s workshop was set up in a corner of Green Lion’s hangar, and in its usual state of organized chaos. There was something that looked a lot like an explosive charge teetering very close to the edge of the workbench, and Lance wasn’t sure if he should be worried or not.

“This…” Pidge started digging through one of the crates under the work desk, “… wait… it’s here somewhere… Hunk said he put it back…”

“This is something you and Hunk are working on?” Lance raised an eyebrow, “now I really feel like I should be worried.”

“No…” Pidge leaned over the edge of the crate, feet coming off the ground, “it’s really cool. Also useful.”

“I can work with cool and useful,” Lance stepped out of the way as Pidge flung something hard looking over her shoulder.

“Here!” Pidge triumphantly held what looked to be a skateboard without wheels above her head.

“That’s a very nice board,” Lance said dutifully.

“Be good or I won’t let you play with it,” Pidge smirked, flipping a switch on the board and dropping it.

It stopped six inches above the ground and floated there.

“Holy crow, you made a hoverboard!” Lance looked at it wide eyed.

He stretched his foot out to tap it, and it would have shot off across the hanger if Pidge hadn’t put her foot out to stop it.

“That’s what we need to work on,” she explained, “I need to calibrate it to compensate for having weight on it. Also steering.”

“Are you sure you don’t want to get Keith in here?” Lance eyed the hoverboard, “he’s the athletic one.”

“I’m sure,” Pidge said firmly, “he wouldn’t be patient enough to let me calibrate it, and then he would try to go to fast on it, and then he would die.”

“And then Allura would kill us,” Lance nodded in agreement.

“Exactly,” Pidge motioned him to step on the board, using her foot to hold it still, “anyway, you’re better at doing this kind of stuff.”

“Better at being your crash dummy?” Lance stepped cautiously onto the board, bracing himself on Pidge’s shoulders.

The board dipped down a few inches, then shot up at least a foot. Lance managed to keep his balance, but he had to hold onto Pidge.

“That’s what I need to fix,” Pidge kept a grip on Lance’s shirt to help keep him steady and reached out to grab her tablet, “it keeps overcompensating for putting weight on it.”

“So, doesn’t that mean you need to test it with lots of different weights?” Lance flailed a bit as the board dropped suddenly in response to Pidge’s fiddling on the tablet, but managed to keep his balance.

“Yeah,” Pidge gave an absent wave of her hand, “I’ll get on it too.”

“If you die Allura really will kill me,” Lance huffed.

“Don’t worry so much,” Pidge rolled her eyes, “I trust you not to let me die.”

Lance gave her a dubious look, but before he could say anything, the board jerked up again, and he had to wrap his arms around Pidge’s shoulders to keep from falling. Pidge snickered, and Lance mussed up her hair, making her squeal.

Lance grinned; he could work with this.

* * *

The comm next to his bed buzzed, and Lance rolled over, groping blindly for it.

They had spent the whole morning doing drills in the Lions, and Lance was exhausted. Flying Red always left him feeling completely wrung out, and he didn’t know how Keith had been able to do it all the time without even looking tired. Maybe Galra were part energizer bunny or something.

While the others had gone to do something useful with their down time after lunch, Lance had decided that the only possible way he was going to make it through afternoon training was to take a nap. He was pretty sure he hadn’t overslept. He knew he had set his alarm.

“This is Lance,” he sat up, rubbing the sleep from his eyes.

“There you are, my boy,” Coran greeted cheerfully, “can you come down to the command center? We could use your help with something.”

“Yep,” Lance tried not to sound too unenthusiastic, “be there in a couple minutes.”

“Excellent!”

Lance didn’t mind helping Coran with chores, he really didn’t. There was a huge amount of maintenance required for the Castle, and there was no way Coran could do it all himself. He had really been hoping for some more sleep though.

It couldn’t be helped, he supposed. Everyone else had things that mattered to do, and that left  just him free to help Coran.

Lance squared his shoulders and pulled on his jacket, heading down to the control room.

It wasn’t what he expected when he got there. Coran wasn’t cleaning anything. He was standing at his station and watching the main screen, which showed Blue crashing clumsily through a field of small asteroids.

Lance winced. He was going to hear about that.

“Princess, perhaps…” Coran frowned up at the screen.

“No,” Allura was on audio, so Lance couldn’t see her face, but he could tell she was frustrated, “I can make this work.”

“I’m sure…” Coran spotted Lance and looked very relieved, “just a moment Princess.”

He switched off the comm and turned to face Lance, “glad you could make it!”

His cheer sounded forced, and Lance approached his station warily, “no problem. What did you need?”

“As I’m sure you know, the princess has been putting in a lot of extra time trying to improve her piloting of Blue Lion,” Coran rubbed the back of his head, “and well…”

“She’s not doing very well,” Lance finished for him, flopping down at his own station.

“So you’ve noticed,” Coran’s shoulders slumped.

“I’ve heard all about it,” Lance flinched as Blue bounced off another asteroid.

“You’ve heard?” Coran gave him a puzzled looked.

“Never mind,” Lance waved his hand, “what did you need me for?”

“I thought you might give the princess some pointers,” Coran was eyeing him speculatively now, and it made Lance squirm a bit.

“Me?” he shook his head, “she’s got a lot more experience than I have. I’m sure she doesn’t need to hear from me.”

“You have much more experience flying the Lions though,” Coran countered, “you are the Blue Paladin after all.”

Lance wanted to tell him he wasn’t anymore, but he couldn’t bring himself to say it out loud, “I can try, I guess.”

“That’s the spirit!” Coran grinned and turned the comm back on, “Princess, Lance is here and might be able to give you some tips.”

“He’s what?” Allura sounded thoroughly flustered by the idea.

“Hi, Princess,” Lance brought up her video feed; he’d rather see her if he was going to talk to her.

“Lance,” Allura greeted, not looking very pleased to see him.

“Um…. So…” Lance struggled to find a place to start. He knew what the problem was, but he wasn’t sure there was a polite way to tell someone they were bossy and didn’t know how to listen. “What are you having trouble with?”

For a moment Allura looked like she was going to continue to deny that there were any problems, but then her shoulders slumped, and she sighed heavily, “the Blue Lion doesn’t seem to want to follow my directions. It’s like it’s fighting me at every turn.”

“Have you asked her why?” Lance offered.

“Asked?” Allura gave him a blank look.

Blue grumbled in the back of Lance’s mind that no one had asked her anything, and if they had, Allura wouldn’t be flying her. Lance decided against pointing out that he had asked Blue to let Allura fly her, but Blue picked up on the thought anyway and gave a huff.

“Yeah,” Lance nodded, “Blue always seems to have a good reason when she wants to go one way, and I want to go the other.”

“There isn’t time for that kind of discussion in a battle,” Allura’s brow wrinkled in exasperation, “in battle there must be a clear chain of command.”

Lance thought it would be ill advised to tell her those conversations had been pretty instantaneous with him and Blue. Also, they never worried much about ‘chain of command’ between the two of them. There had never been an instance where it had become an issue, but Lance knew exactly what would have happened if they had reached a point where it was.

“If someone has to be in charge, then it has to be Blue,” Lance told her, “but really, it’s better if you can be partners.”

“But I’m the pilot,” Allura protested, “the pilot is supposed to be in charge.”

“Blue is a 16,000 year old giant sentinel robot cat,” Lance pointed out, “fighting her is like trying to fight the tide.”

“What’s a tide?” Allura said in confusion.

“Right, Altea had no above ground oceans,” Lance slumped in his chair, trying to come up with a way to explain it, “tides are a force of nature, like gravity.”

“We manipulate gravity all the time,” Allura gave him a dour look, “the Castle is continuously changing gravitational fields to keep gravity within the ship constant.”

“Well, you don’t change tides,” Lance shook his head, “tides are all of these universal forces, gravity, and rotation, and momentum, flowing together to make a massive surge, and if you try to fight it, you lose. Tides always win.”

“What a remarkable planet you come from,” Coran looked fascinated.

“Yeah, it is,” Lance had to look down briefly, then mentally shook himself and looked back up at Allura, “the point is, you’re wasting your time and energy trying to fight Blue. She knows what she’s doing.”

“But clearly, if we don’t want to hit asteroids, we have to go around them,” Allura huffed.

“Just try letting her lead and see what happens,” Lance suggested, “at this point the worse that could happen is you hit more asteroids.”

Allura looked like she wanted to protest again, but then took a breath and let it out slowly, “alright.”

The next run wasn’t perfect, but it was a significant improvement over the one before.

“That was much more difficult,” Allura slumped a little in her seat.

“Well, no one said being a defender of the universe would be easy,” Lance shrugged.

“No,” Allura agreed, then smiled tiredly, “thank you for your help.”

“Any time,” Lance grinned back.

Blue grumbled about the whole mess that was their current situation, but at least it had been better. That was worth something for all of them.

* * *

“Do we have a better schematic of the ship?” Lance leaned his head on his hand, giving the three-dimensional display hovering over the conference table an unimpressed look.

“Unfortunately no,” Allura sighed, “the data was corrupted, and we weren’t able to salvage enough of it to complete the schematics.”

There was a relatively easy fix for that, but Allura was nowhere near being able to use Blue’s sonic gun. Given how frustrated she already was, bringing that up seemed like it would be less than helpful.

“We’re missing a whole half of the ship though,” Keith’s brow wrinkled pensively, “what are we hoping to get out of this?”

“Data,” Pidge answered, looking excited, “this is a command ship, and their hard drives should have the encryption codes we need to be able to listen in on some of the high command’s communications. They probably have a ton of other stuff too, personnel files, supply lines, maybe even prisoner records and intel reports.”

“Then it will be heavily guarded, right?” Lance reached out and spun the display, but the new angle did nothing to improve his opinion of it.

“We think so,” Allura pulled up another round of information, enlarging it so they could see, “but the potential value of the information we could gain is very high.”

Keith frowned at the statistics for the escort fleet, “I’m not sure it’s worth the risk. There are a lot of unknowns here, especially once we get on board the ship.”

“Those encryption codes could give us access to communications from top tier Galra officials,” Pidge leaned forward eagerly, “we might actually be able to stay ahead of them.”

“It looks super risky, though,” Hunk shifted nervously in his seat, “even that kind of intel isn’t worth someone getting hurt.”

“Or worse,” Keith folded his arms across his chest, “I don’t think it’s worth it with how incomplete our intel is.”’

“We’ve taken on missions with less intel before,” Allura countered, “I believe our team can handle it, and we should proceed.”

This wasn’t the first mission they had run since Shiro’s disappearance, and they had done missions before on worse intel with a lot less planning, but there was a lot of risk involved.

Lance continued to frown at the projection. No one was saying it, but there could be intel on Pidge’s family or even on Shiro if the Galra had him. He hoped the Galra didn’t have him; he hoped there was nothing about Shiro at all on that ship. The potential to know, though…

Tempting though it was, everything about the mission felt wrong; it felt like there was too much risk for not enough gain. With Lance and Allura still struggling with their Lions, waiting until they had a better handle on both the intel and themselves seemed like a better option. It wasn’t the first time they had come across this sort of ship, and Lance was pretty sure it wouldn’t be the last.

He wasn’t sure anyone would really care what he thought, though.

Lance didn’t notice Keith looking at him as if he expected him to say something. When he didn’t, Keith folded into himself slightly.

“Then I guess we’re going for it,” Keith conceded.

* * *

Lance was beginning to regret not saying anything.

“Lance! What’s your status!” Keith’s voice crackled over the comm, breathless from fighting.

“Pinned,” Lance tried to keep his voice level as he continued firing, “we’re not going to be able to get back the way we came.”

There was a lot of cursing on the line, some in Altean. Lance would have to ask Coran if Allura had just said what he thought she had said later. If there was a later for him.

“We’re coming back towards you,” Keith said, “find a position you can hold and don’t try to come to us. There are too many troops between us.”

Lance ducked around a corner, shooting a control panel on the wall and dropping a bulkhead. It wouldn’t take them long to bypass it or come at him from a different direction, but it gave him a minute to think.

The plan had been for him and Allura to cover the escape route while the rest of the team pushed forward to the main console to get the data. The forward team had encountered heavier resistance than expected though, and Lance had told Allura to go help them. It should have been alright, but not knowing the layout of the ship well had come back to bite them. Troops had been able to get between Lance and the rest of the team.

He was totally on his own.

Something hard slammed against the bulkhead, and Lance flinched, backing away from it. Blue pressed restlessly against him, worried, wanting to come get him. Lance pushed back. Blue needed to stay where Allura left her, or she might not be able to escape.

He couldn’t feel Red at all outside the cockpit. He really was completely on his own.

Lance turned to sprint down the corridor, possibilities and scenarios running through his head. He turned a corner and spun to shoot another panel, putting another bulkhead between himself and the troops.

In the end, he knew what they had to do to get the most amount of people out.

“Keith,” Lance activated his comm.

“We’re on our way,” Keith sounded more breathless, and there were sounds of blaster fire in the background, “hang on. We’re hitting heavy fire coming back towards you.”

“You need to find an exit route,” Lance ducked around a corner and dropped low at the sound of approaching troops, “you’re not going to be able to make it to me.”

There was a chorus of chaotic protests over the comm.

“Shut up!” Lance raised his voice over them, “you can’t get back this way. Get out. I’ll get myself out.”

He didn’t really think he could at this point, but better for most of the team to get away, then all of them to get caught.

Blue pushed harder, anger bubbling up through her concern. He told her to stay. Allura needed her.

“We’re not leaving you behind,” Hunk growled in his ear, the rapid fire of his gun loud.

“Just get out of here,” Lance brought his gun to his shoulder, sighting down the barrel to where he expected the troops to appear, “I’ll be fine.”

He wouldn’t, and he knew it.

“Lance!” Keith protested.

“Just go!” Lance cut his comm and opened fire as the first line of troops rounded the corner.

It wasn’t the best spot to shoot from, but the corner gave him some cover, and he was able to hold back the advance temporarily. It didn’t take long for them to get a shot in though. He jerked back as a the shot slammed into his shoulder, but his armor held.

Blue roared, and Lance felt her surge forward. She didn’t listen when he tried to push her back, and Lance let out a string of curses and opened his comm again.

“Blue is coming to get me,” he told them, “I couldn’t stop her, I’m sorry. Allura, you’re going to have to leave with someone else.”

“Don’t worry about that,” Allura huffed, “just get yourself to the Blue Lion safely.”

Two more shots ricocheted off the wall near his head, and he fired a few more back before scrambling to his feet and falling back again. If he could get to an airlock, Blue would be able to get him. He reached out for his Lion, and Blue pushed through the map he needed. They still didn’t have a complete layout of the ship, but Blue could give him an approximate location for where he was on the maps they did have.

He rounded another corner and ducked cautiously into a side room before couching low and bringing up the map on his arm display. He was close to an airlock, just two halls over. He might actually be able to make it.

Blue assured him she would rip apart the entire ship if he didn’t.

Lance thought that might have been a good plan, regardless, once the whole team had managed to get off the ship. He came under fire three more times and got hit again before he made it to the airlock. He was going to be bruised, but his armor did its job.

He reached the airlock with no troops in sight, but he knew they were closing in fast behind him, and possibly from the front as well. He was faced with a much bigger problem though. He couldn’t access the controls to the airlock, and his gun didn’t have the power to shoot through both sets of doors, possibly at all, but definitely not before the next round of troops got there.

He was about to call Pidge to see if she could help remotely, when two soldiers rounded the corner and opened fire. He barely managed to get his shield up in time. Blue was right on the other side of the airlock, but he wasn’t sure how to get to her, and he knew there were more troops coming.

He didn’t know what to do.

 _Brace,_ Blue said very clearly.

Lance dropped to one knee without hesitation, closing his face shield and engaging the magnetic locks on his suit to keep him anchored. He looked up to see another round of Galra troops approaching him, but they didn’t get the chance to open fire.

There was the ear splitting sound of metal being ripped apart, and Lance looked up to see claws rending through the skin of the ship as Blue dug in and anchored herself. Most of the soldiers scrambled back, desperate to put a bulkhead between themselves and the air whistling quickly out around the Lion’s claws. Two of them, though, continued to try to advance on Lance, leaning back against the pull of escaping atmosphere.

As the one in the lead raised his gun at Lance, the corridor exploded. Blue ripped the airlock off with her teeth, flinging it into space. Even with his suit, Lance felt the sudden change in pressure reverberate through his chest. He had to lean low and duck his head against the sudden hurricane of wind caused by the gaping hole Blue had ripped into the ship. He barely registered the two soldiers being pulled out into space.

At Blue’s prompting, he released the magnetic locks and let himself be pulled into weightlessness. He had a split second to register the stars twinkling above him, then Blue’s jaws closed around him, reasserting gravity and atmosphere.

There wasn’t time to savor the solidness of Blue around him. He didn’t know the status of the rest of the team, and he was scrambling to his feet and sprinting to the cockpit almost as soon as Blue’s jaws were closed.

“Is everyone clear?” Lance asked as he dropped into his seat, wrapping his hands around the controls.

“Lance, where are you?” Hunk demanded.

“I’m in Blue,” screens came to life around him, showing him the location of the team.

They were still on the ship, close to a hanger from the looks of it. Their Lions had zeroed in on the location already to retrieve them, but there was a lot of heavy fire preventing them from getting close and they didn’t fight as well without their pilots.

“Are you okay?” Pidge demanded.

“I’m fine,” Lance assured her.

He was surprised to realize he actually was. Sitting in Blue’s cockpit, everything felt like it had clicked back into place. He hadn’t realized how hard it had been flying Red until suddenly everything was easy again. No push, no pull, no constant struggle to understand, like a rainstorm after a long, dusty, dry spell.

“How close are you to the hanger?” Lance brought Blue around, charging straight into the fire fight the other Lions were struggling with.

“Just another dobash, and we’ll be in,” Allura sounded slightly out of breath, “I think.”

“Pidge, hurry up with the door,” Keith called, “Lance, what does it look like out there?”

“Messy,” Lance used the tail laser to freeze several close clustered ships at once, “I’m going to try to punch a hole through so at least one of the Lions can get into the hanger.”

“Be careful,” there was yelling in the background, and Keith cut his comm suddenly.

Lance’s heart skipped a beat at the sudden silence, but Blue pushed against him, calm despite the chaos surrounding them. They needed to focus on clearing a path to the others. They could do this.

All his fear dissipated, and Lance dropped into his bond with Blue, like ducking under waves on his surfboard, there was the rush and the surge of power, and he knew exactly what to do.

It was hard work clearing the way for the other Lions, but they managed to get create an opening for Black and Yellow to get through. Lance did his best to cover them while the two Lions ripped through the haul to get to the hanger.

It felt like it was taking forever for them to get back out, but suddenly, Black Lion’s feed popped up on his screen, showing Keith, looking grimy and exhausted, and Allura standing behind the pilot’s chair looking not much better.

“We made it to the Lions,” Keith wasn’t even looking at the screen, focused instead on piloting, “are you alright?”

Lance’s whole body slumped with relief, “I’m fine, but can we rip this ship part now?”

“Yes!” Pidge came into view on Yellow Lion’s feed, leaning over Hunk’s shoulder and fiddling with controls.

“We need to make sure Red and Green get safely back to the castle,” Keith pushed forward on the controls, and Black shot out of the hole they had torn in the haul, followed closely by Yellow, “then we can tear it apart.”

Lance felt a twinge of guilt. Red hadn’t engaged in the attack with the other Lions. With how weak Lance’s bond was with her, and Keith being focused on Black, she probably couldn’t. The last thing Lance wanted, though, was to abandon her. Blue’s reassurance that Red was fine washed over him, and he focused on the fight again.

“We’ll play escort for getting them back,” Hunk pulled Yellow away from Black, heading towards Red with Green following behind.

“Then let’s shred this thing,” Keith said darkly, throwing Black into the fight.

It wasn’t much of a fight now that they were back in their Lions, particularly after Hunk and Yellow joined in. They left the ship in pieces and didn’t look back.

It wasn’t until they were safely back in the hangar that Lance’s hands started to shake. He leaned on the controls and let his head drop, struggling to suck in air, because everything that had just happened, getting separated from the team, being faced with an overwhelming enemy with no way out and no one to help him, and being so utterly isolated from everyone, he was going to have to do again, and again, and again, for as long as he had to keep flying Red.

A sob tried to squeeze past his tight throat, and he closed his eyes, trying to hold back tears. This wasn’t what the team needed from him; he had to be able to be whatever they needed him to be, but he didn’t think he could keep doing this.

Blue brushed against him, steady, rhythmic, unyielding in her conviction that everything was going to be okay. There was an undercurrent there, something Blue knew or saw that Lance couldn’t yet, but he couldn’t follow that stream of thought at the moment. Instead, he tried to match his breathing to her steady pulse, and slowly, gradually, the air started cooperating, and he could breathe again.

“Lance?” Hunk called anxiously into the helmet comm, “are you alright? Why are you still in your Lion?”

Lance swallowed and took one last deep breath before answering, “I’m fine. I’m coming out.”

* * *

Lance didn’t even manage to make it out of Blue’s mouth before Hunk had lifted him up and was crushing him in a hug.

“Are you alright? Your armor is charred; you got hit! How badly are you hurt?” Hunk babbled breathlessly, clutching Lance to him almost too tight.

Lance couldn’t find the words to answer, instead clinging to Hunk and pressing his face against his shoulder. He grunted slightly when Pidge impacted his side, wrapping her arms tight around his middle and pressing her face against him. He couldn’t quite bring himself to let go of Hunk yet to hug her back.

“Hunk, ease up a little,” Keith put a steadying hand on Lance’s back, “let’s get a look at where you were hit.”

Hunk let him go so he could step back, but Pidge stayed plastered to his side, and Lance dropped an arm around her shoulders and squeezed.

“I’m okay,” Lance finally found his voice, “my armor held. Is everyone else okay?”

“Worse for wear, but no serious injuries, I believe,” Allura’s lips pressed into a thin line, “you took more than one direct hit though.”

Pidge tightened her arm around him, and Lance knew there should have been a joke in there somewhere, but he was too tired to figure it out.

“We’re lucky your bond with Blue is still strong,” Allura glanced up at the Lion towering over them, “maybe that’s why I’m having such a difficult time piloting her.”

Pidge felt Lance go ridged against her and suck in a sharp breath, and something in her snapped. She let him go, spinning to face Allura.

“No, you’re having a hard time piloting Blue because she doesn’t want you,” Pidge growled, “she wants Lance.”

“Well, I understand that, but…” Allura tried to sound reasonable, but mostly ended up sound irritated.

“No buts!” Pidge cut her off, “none of this should have ever happened.”

“Pidge, maybe calm down a little…” Hunk put a hand on her shoulder, but she shrugged him off.

“No,” she glared up at him, then turned her glare back to Allura, “Lance almost died. No more buts.”

“I admit it was ill advised for us to rush into this mission,” Allura’s shoulders slumped.

“Well, that’s one way to put it,” Keith grumbled under his breath.

“However,” Allura frowned at him, “I don’t see what that has to do with Lance and the Blue Lion.”

“Because Lance not flying Blue made everything worse!” Pidge leaned towards her, “the whole idea of pulling him out of his Lion was stupid to start with.”

“Pidge,” Allura folded her arms over her chest, “I know it’s difficult, but we can’t afford to be down a Lion.”

“So you think putting three Lions at a huge disadvantage instead of two is the solution?” Pidge waved a finger at her, “why would you mess up something that’s working to do something that obviously doesn’t work?”

“The Blue Lion is the most accommodating,” Allura countered, “this is our best chance of success given the current situation.”

“Well, she’s not accommodating you!” Pidge pushed back, “and there’s nothing easy about flying any of the Lions.”

“I never said it was easy,” Allura huffed.

“Um, actually, you did,” Hunk ventured, “when you said you wanted to try flying Blue.”

“Oh,” Allura blinked, “I didn’t mean they were easy to fly, just that I felt Blue would be the most likely to accept a second Paladin, particularly one not of her choosing.”

“Well, she’s not,” Pidge scowled, “so we need to stop. It’s putting everyone in danger.”

“Pidge,” Allura rubbed the bridge of her nose, “we can’t just…”

“No,” Keith cut in, “Pidge is right. This isn’t working. Lance needs to be back in Blue, and we need to try something different.”

“I really don’t think…” Allura frowned at him.

“No,” Keith said firmly, “I’m supposed to be team lead, right?”

“Well, yes,” Allura looked puzzled by the questions, “of course you are.”

“Then I get to make decisions like this,” Keith said, “not having Lance in Blue is putting everyone at risk. He’s going back to flying her, and you can try with Red.”

“Red?” Allura eyes the Lion doubtfully.

“Well, you’re both stubborn enough,” Keith shrugged.

Pidge couldn’t stop the giggle that escaped at that.

“Just try it,” Keith said, “and if it doesn’t work, we’ll try something else, but we’re not going to keep doing something that obviously isn’t working.”

“You do make a good point,” Allura admitted, “I supposed it wouldn’t hurt to at least try with the Red Lion.”

“So we’re good then?” Keith looked suddenly less certain.

“Yes,” Allura nodded.

“Finally,” Pidge huffed and flopped against Keith’s side.

Hunk thumped Keith on the back hard enough that he had to take a step forward to keep his balance.

“So Lance, are you good with…” Keith turned to where Lance had been standing and found him gone.

“Lance?” Hunk looked around nervously.

“Where is he?” Pidge straightened, “he was right here.”

“We should find him,” Hunk shifted anxiously, “we didn’t check how badly he was hurt, and he’s been really stressed lately, and we should look for him.”

“Hunk breath,” Keith gave his shoulder a squeeze, “we’ll split up and look for him, just to make sure he’s okay.”

“Okay,” Hunk agreed, “we should hurry though.”

“We’ll find him, Hunk,” Keith assured him, “don’t worry.”

* * *

Keith had come to the conclusion that Lance had to be hiding. It had been almost half an hour and no one had found him yet. While Hunk’s panic was steadily mounting, Keith was beginning to wonder if maybe they should just leave Lance be. He might just need some time to himself to decompress. It had been a difficult mission, and there had been some close calls.

Keith shuddered.

They needed to find him, if only for their own piece of mind. If Lance needed space, that was fine, but they needed to know he was okay and hadn’t passed out somewhere from injuries they hadn’t noticed, as Hunk had theorized twice already over the comm. That seemed unlikely, but it was enough to keep Keith looking.

Keith turned into a residential wing they didn’t use very often. It was mostly closed up, but it had a lounge with a large window that they sometimes liked to use when they were looking for a quiet spot on the ship. Keith heard a whining, broken gasp as he walked by the lounge door.

He froze, then cautiously entered the darkened room. The blue strip of light that ringed the ceiling gave off a soft glow, and stars flickered through the window, drifting past them as the ship moved towards a safer location where they could lay low and regroup.

He didn’t see Lance at first, but the gasping, shaky breathing continued, and it only took Keith a moment to zero in on where Lance was huddled against the far wall. He had tossed aside his chest plate and helmet and had his knees drawn up with his face pressed against them. His whole body was shaking with the effort it seemed to be taking for him just to breath.

“Lance?” Keith approached him cautiously, suddenly worried that Hunk might have been right about the injuries.

Lance flinched back, curling tighter into himself, and Keith frowned. There was something vaguely familiar about this. He dropped down to the floor next to him and put a careful hand on his shoulder.

“Are you hurt?” he asked.

“Can’t… breathe…” Lance looked up at him, tears running down his cheeks from the effort of trying to draw in air.

Something clicked into place in Keith’s head. He had seen this before, although not with Lance. Shiro had had panic attacks in the past. It hadn’t looked quite like this; Shiro had acted more like there was some kind of threat, or he was in danger, but this felt the same to Keith. It had made Shiro worse to touch him or be too loud, but being near him and talking to him had seemed to help.

Hopefully, it would help Lance too.

“Lance, look at me,” Keith shifted around so he was sitting facing him, “everything is going to be fine. Just try to breathe with me, okay.”

Keith took a deep, slow breath and let it out. Lance tried to mimic him, but he didn’t seem to be able to get a full breath in.

“That’s good,” Keith encouraged, reaching out slowly to take Lance’s hand.

When Lance didn’t jerk away, he pressed the hand to his own chest so Lance could feel him breathe. He took another breath, and Lance tried again to breathe with him. Keith lost track of how long he sat facing Lance, both of them just breathing together.

He didn’t stop until Lance uncurled, his head falling limply back against the wall.

“Better?” Keith asked softly.

“I…” Lance rubbed at his eyes, hands still shaky, “I’m sorry.”

“You don’t need to be…” Keith started.

“I’m sorry,” Lance repeated, breath hitching, “I can’t… I’ve been trying really hard to do what you guys need me to, but I can’t… I can’t just… Blue thinks I’m worth something… and…”

Keith blinked at him dumbly, not quite sure what Lance was talking about.

“She actually wants me…” Lance’s breath was speeding up again, and he was starting to shake harder, “I know I’m not very good at a lot of things I’m supposed to be good at, but Blue picked me and she… I can’t just give her up… I don’t even know how to break the bond with her, but…”

“What?” Keith had no idea what Lance was talking about or where he would have gotten the idea that they were asking him to somehow sever his bond with Blue.

He was going to work himself up into another panic attack if he kept going though.

“I just… I don’t know how I could manage if…” Lance shuddered, “I need…”

“Lance stop,” Keith cut him off, “breathe. You’re going to have another panic attack at this rate.”

“Panic attack?” Lance echoed blurrily.

“Yeah,” Keith nodded, “one is enough.”

Lance nodded, taking a shaky breath, then another, “I’m sorry.”

“You don’t need to be,” Keith shifted to lean back against the wall beside him, their shoulders just touching, “also, no one wants you to give up Blue.”

“But Allura said my bond with Blue was the reason she was having trouble flying her,” Lance drew his knees up to his chest.

“I’m pretty sure that’s not what she meant,” Keith frowned at him, “and it wouldn’t have mattered if it was. Blue wants you as her pilot, right?”

“Yeah,” Lance nodded, resting his chin on his knees, “but…”

“We want you as Blue’s pilot,” Keith said firmly, “Allura is terrible at it.”

“She’s… not?” Lance said weakly, as if he felt obligated to defend the princess.

“Does Blue like having her as a pilot?” Keith asked, “be honest.”

“No,” Lance admitted, “they have trouble understanding each other, and Allura isn’t very good at listening to her.”

“See,” Keith nudged his shoulder lightly, “you could have said that like a month ago and saved us all a lot of trouble.”

Lance frowned at him without lifting his head.

“You missed Pidge’s tirade about how stupid not having you pilot Blue was,” Keith smirked a little, “maybe someone’s gear recorded it.”

“Allura is okay with that?” Lance finally straightened.

“With Pidge yelling at her?” Keith shrugged, “probably. It’s not like we can stop Pidge if she’s not.”

“No, that’s not…” Lance looked uncertain if Keith was joking or not.

“Yes,” Keith clarified, “Allura is done with Blue. There’s no reason to keep going with something that’s not working. We need you back where you belong.”

Lance took a deep breath and let it out slowly, his shoulders relaxing.

“I’m sorry,” he looked away, “I didn’t want to make everything harder.”

“I’m pretty sure everything is going to be hard no matter what,” Keith let his head fall back against the wall with a thump, “it helps when we don’t drag things out and just say something when there’s a problem, so I’m sorry too.”

“Why?” Lance looked thoroughly confused.

“I knew pretty much from the start that it wasn’t going to work very well to have Allura piloting Blue and you in Red,” Keith admitted without looking at Lance, “but Allura seemed so sure, and she has more experience than I do at just about everything. I thought it was better to just let her make decisions like that. I mean, I don’t know what the hell I’m doing.”

Lance stared at him for a moment, then snickered. Keith gave him an unimpressed look, and Lance just shook his head, hand coming up to muffled more snickering. When that didn’t work, he hid his face against Keith’s shoulder.

“You know,” Keith rolled his eyes and elbowed Lance lightly, “you could help by actually saying something before we do stupid things.”

“You want to know what I think?” Lance shifted from his shoulder just enough to look up at him.

“Yeah,” Keith nodded.

“I think you’re doing a pretty good job,” Lance said, then dropped his head back to rest on his shoulder again.

Keith stared at him for a moment, then laughed softly and pulled his arm out from between them to drop around Lance’s shoulders, “thanks.”

They sat in the quiet for a while, watching the stars drift past the window while Lance’s breathing continued to slow, and his shaking stopped.

“You know we think you do a good job too, right?” Keith finally broke the quiet, “Blue knew what she was doing when she picked you.”

“I…” Lance breathed out slowly, “thanks.”

“So, are you feeling…” Keith was interrupted by his wrist comm going off, and he switched it on.

“We can’t find him anywhere,” Hunk’s voice was high with panic, “something must have happened. Pidge is going to deploy…”

“He’s with me,” Keith winced, “sorry, Hunk. I should have called when I found him.”

Keith ignored the curious look Lance was giving him.

“Is he okay?” Hunk seemed too worried to be angry, “is he hurt?”

“We’re okay,” Keith briefly tightened his arm around Lance’s shoulders.

“Sorry Hunk,” Lance leaned in a little to make sure the comm would pick up his voice.

“As long as you’re okay,” Hunk sounded a little uncertain.

“Yeah, I am,” Lance assured him.

“I’ll let everyone know then,” Hunk’s exhale was audible.

“Thanks Hunk,” Keith said, “you feel up to cooking? I think we could all use a good dinner and a down night.”

“Movie night?” Lance suggested.

“Yeah,” Keith agreed.

“That sounds kind of fantastic,” Hunk admitted, “I’ll let everyone know.”

“Thanks,” Keith smiled, “we’ll be there soon to help you with dinner.”

The comm went silent, and they sat for a few more minutes, tired but finally relaxed.

“You know Red and Allura are going to maul each other, right?” Lance asked as he finally sat up.

“Yeah,” Keith smirked, “it’s going to be fantastic.”

Lance collapsed back against him laughing, and Keith grinned. They were going to be just fine.


End file.
